What Is Love?

If you do this for me, then I will love you. Is this love?

I don’t love you anymore. I used to be in love with you, but now I am not. You used to make me happy and now you are making me miserable. Is this love?

Love is unconditional. Love is eternal. Love is the only thing that is real.

When you fall out of love with someone, the part that goes away is not love. It is ego. It is ego telling you that you deserve someone better. It is ego telling you that you are unhappy because your partner isn’t treating you like you deserve to be treated. This is not love. It is your ego disguising itself as love.

So how can you tell the difference between ego and love?

Ego creates feelings of fear, manipulation and the need to control. Ego says, “I need you to do this for me or be this way for me and then I will love you.” Ego is about taking from others to get the ego’s needs met. If the other doesn’t give you what you need, the ego is hurt, damaged and resentful. This is not love.

Love is the opposite of ego. Love does not wish to control. Love is freedom. Love does not come from others. Love comes from connectedness to Source. Love cannot be taken away. You cannot lose love because love is inside you. You are love. You cannot lose something that you are.

Relationships come and go. You can lose a girlfriend, a spouse or a romantic partner. You can feel the loss of a relationship that is no more. But you haven’t lost love. You’ve only lost a particular relationship with a person because it has served its purpose and now it’s time for a new experience.

When you are experiencing a breakup, you can choose to be sad. If that’s how you feel it’s ok to feel sadness. But you can also choose to appreciate the expansion new experiences will bring. You can appreciate the expansion for yourself and for your former partner. We are not here to control and contain ourselves or anyone else. We are here for the expansion of our consciousness. We are all one consciousness and we all benefit from the expansion that new experiences bring.

So honor the time you had with your partner. Appreciate how it helped you grow. Understand that now is the time to feel the abundance of new possibilities and the inevitable expansion that follows. Know that it is simply a choice of whether you look to the past or choose to be present in the moment as you allow new possibilities to enter into your experience.

What is love?

Love is expansion. Love is space. Love is allowing the abundant love of the Universe to flow into your experience. Love is acceptance. Love is embracing the parts you don’t like about yourself and healing them with love and understanding. Love is allowing. Love is forgiveness. Love is kindness. Love is service to others. Love is freedom. Love is allowing desire to pull you towards new experiences so you can expand into the fullness of who you really are.

So be sad for a while if you must. But don’t linger in this feeling for too long. There is great love and expansion waiting for you.